Please Do Not Eat These Foods.

If you have any decency left in your withering bodies, do not seek sustenance here. Go elsewhere. This will not fill your bellies. This will only addle your brains.

Since we're all so connected and the distance between Cyber- and Internal-space is becoming thinner by the day, we all know what the other people are thinking about with the help of a little tool called 'Trending Now.' At least on the Yahoo home page, a litany of terms greet you when you sign in, expressing that these terms are being searched about more than most. Earlier today, I noticed an alarming topic that was, for some reason known only to Transylvanian seafood restaurant owners, 'trending now.' That topic?

Dracula fish.

I don't know what they are. I daren't even click on the link, lest my love of Dracula and fish become enmeshed and, thereby, ruined. And I don't care if "daren't" isn't a true contraction. Darn well should be.

Then I reloaded the page a few hours later in the day. Now trending?

Spaghetti Tacos.

So there's mid-term elections coming up, the MLB playoffs have begun, terrorist plans have just been obtained, a new fuzzy video of Bin Laden is floating around out there, obesity epidemic research is positing new and relevant theories, my sister is turning 38..... and a high percentage of the internet-searching public are looking for information on Dracula Fish and Spaghetti Tacos?

Maybe Wired magazine was right. The Web is Dead. At least British pub owners will have something new to put on their menu for the first time in 1,000 years. ("They're bloody Fish 'n Chips! Get it?")